Mormon Glory Holes

#062 Mormon Glory Holes

Jacob 5:1-36

Smitty frankensteins the fuck out of an olive tree, and winds up killing it. He should have left it alone.

Brother Jones tells Sister Patience about two recent events in Utah.

1. The lighting up of the BYU "Y" in trans and pride colours.
2. Legislation to exclude trans-girls from participating in high-school sports.

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Memorable Quote 1:

Brother Jones: "In verse 8 he says it doesn't matter if this thing dies, and then in verse 10 he's like, Oh no it's gonna die! Fuck'n make up your mind, Lord of the vineyard!"

Memorable Quote 2:

Brother Jones: "Patience, Patience. You are making a classic mistake. You are trying to logically look at this bullshit."

Highlights:

• Walk like a Reformed Egyptian?
• Opa Mormon Style!
• Stay just a little bit longer, and preserve some olive jam?
• The harvest afterparty with the Lord of the Vineyard, his servant, and a lovely hay-loft...
• In Mormonism, the special sauce is always seed.